I HAVE....

I have faults.

I have doubts.

I have desires.

I have emotions that are all over the place (being I am a woman).

I have temptations.

 I have dreams.

I have hope.

I have joy.

I have peace.

My favorite verse in the bible is where I want to be:

"She is clothed with strength and dignity, and laughs with no fear of the future." Psalms 31:25 (NIV)

I am getting there.

I am closer everyday.

I will be that woman.  (soon)

Living out Love

I often ask myself.........   Am I loving enough? Am I loving the way Christ wants me to love? Am I loving to myself? I admit, I tend to over think. Oh, who am I kidding.............. I ANALYSE things to DEATH!

If everything in the WORD revolves around LOVE, then it is something we need to really think about and seek to understand.

GOD's LOVE is expressed this way..........

Psalm 36:5  Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.

How can I, a sinner saved by HIS mercy and grace, have that kind of love of others?

But What About ME????? 

 Isn't that what really keeps me from loving like the Father? Selfishness.... Self-centered attitudes

Here is God's command to us.

John 13:34

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

That's it........... Love.

 

I can truly say, God has shown me love.......... good times and bad. I know that true love only comes through Him. He is the answer to growth and change. And we all need to CHANGE into the NEW person Christ wants us to be.

 

Ephesians 4:21-23 (New International Version)
"21.Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. 22. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23. to be made new in the attitude of your minds."

It begins with a new mindset........ making a decision not to believe the lies that Satan wants us to believe. Satan is YOUR ENEMY,  CHRIST is YOUR SAVIOR. When I made up my mind that I was not going to listen to the JUNK Satan was saying to my mind, my spirit, my inner child, I was only going to believe what was TRUTH in God's word, Everything became CLEAR to me! I was released from the prison of misery, unhappiness and fear. I became FREE!

God is blessing my life daily. I see it everywhere around me and I feel it in my soul. I just have to keep my focus on HIM. Oh yeah, I'm a JESUS FREAK! and very boldly proud of it! Because HE drew me to HIM!

John 6:44 (New International Version)     "No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him, and I will raise him up at the last day."

GOD selected me. Now, that is LOVE.

Not Just the Potter, but the MAKER of the Clay

I had a bad day yesterday. There, I said it. I get to have one every now and then. It is times like yesterday that I have to spend hours, not minutes, with my heavenly Father. A praise song in the car won't work. A devotional won't cut it. Five minute prayers aren't enough, I NEED JESUS to love up on me. And I needed him in the worst way yesterday.

I went for a long drive just to talk to God. I didn't feel comforted, or even at peace for the first 50 miles. I drove quietly with the radio off for a long time just talking to Him.  God is always present, always loving, and He is ALWAYS right here with you.

It was a beautiful day for a drive. Sun was shining, very  little traffic on the road ,and as I passed mile and after mile, my spirit began to lift. I drove until I felt enough peace to turn around and head back home. I drove a long, long, time. Some days are like that.

But peace came, the filling of my spirit came, and joy returned to my heart. As I drove home, I began thinking about a China cup. Sometimes I feel like a small delicate China cup  that has fallen to the floor and broken into many pieces.

"FRAGILE"

I envision Christ himself picking up the pieces..... carefully putting them back together because I am precious to Him. One by one, repairing the damage that was done. Putting back together, a broken vessel.

That is when the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart.......  " I am not just the Potter, but also the maker of the clay.

  Isaiah 64:8 "But now, O LORD, You are our Father, We are the clay, and You our potter; And all of us are the work of Your hand."

Christ put me together. Every cell, every hair, ever bone, everything!  HE made piece by piece. I was not created by some cosmic accident. God perfected me. Psalms 139:14 "I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well."

 

I am having a much better today,                            ..Thank you, Father! 

It is amazing what time spent with Him will do for your soul.  

I'm No BLOG-spert...

I am no BLOG-spert, I write because that is what God laid on my heart to do.

I write because I have been there, done that and God is still faithful, His truths are relevant, and His love covers all.

Everyone's life has it's share of disappointments, but GOD remains steadfast, loving, and forgiving.  I want to be more like Him. I want to share how God has healed this broken woman. I want others to know the POWER of His word. I want others to feel LOVED beyond measure.

I can only share what is real and true in my life. The only thing constant in my has been GOD. People let you down. Circumstances seem overwhelming. The future may seem bleak, but God's word says otherwise.

God is love.

God is love.

God is love.

What that means to me is that if I am hurting, God's love will heal my hurts. (Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.")  If I am unsure, God will give me reassurance. ( 1 Timothy 3:13 "Those who have served well gain an excellent standing and great assurance in their faith in Christ Jesus.")   If I don't know what to do, God will direct my path. (Proverbs 3:6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.")


 If I sin, God will forgive  (Luke 7:47 Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.") If I am faithful, I will have joy in the Lord. (Matthew 25:21 "His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!')
 

There are two forces within this world. Christ and Satan. Satan wants us to live in oppression. God wants to give us freedom. Real freedom.  I choose not to live in oppression anymore. I believe the truths in God's word. He is alive, He is real, He loves. There is no other way to find joy, peace, happiness, and fulfillment in life. Aren't you tired of trying to do it on your own?

Come to the Father..........

Matthew 11:28 "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

I Can Only Imagine....

"I can only imagine what it will be like, when I walk by Your side...

I can only imagine, what my eyes will see, when Your Face is before me!

I can only imagine. I can only imagine.

Surrounded by Your Glory, what will my heart feel?

Will I dance for you, Jesus? Or in awe of You, be still?

Will I stand in Your presence, or to my knees will I fall?

Will I sing 'Hallelujah!'? Will I be able to speak at all?

I can only imagine! I can only imagine!

I can only imagine, when that day comes, when I find myself standing in the Son!

I can only imagine, when all I will do, is forever, forever worship You!

I can only imagine! I can only imagine!

Surrounded by Your Glory, what will my heart feel?

Will I dance for you, Jesus? Or in awe of You, be still?

Will I stand in Your presence, or to my knees will I fall?

Will I sing 'Hallelujah!'? Will I be able to speak at all?

I can only imagine! Yeah! I can only imagine!

Surrounded by Your Glory, what will my heart feel?

Will I dance for you, Jesus? Or in awe of You, be still?

Will I stand in Your presence, or to my knees will I fall?

Will I sing 'Hallelujah!'? Will I be able to speak at all?

I can only imagine! Yeah! I can only imagine!

I can only imagine! Yeah! I can only imagine!! Only imagine!!!

I can only imagine.

I can only imagine, when all I do is forever, forever worship You!

I can only imagine."

Thanks God  :)

Lyrics by Mercyme

Waiting to Exhale....

There use to be a song I listened to by that name..... "Waiting to Exhale"

"That" just about describes where I am.    I have been holding everything inside for so very long.............. I am just afraid if I ever exhale everything will come out.................. and my life story is heartbreaking.

Pure and simple, If I let myself really think about what I have been through in life, still going through.... My own heart would BREAK in two.


As I write this, tears fall from my eyes because GOD who created me, who loves me, who cares for me, must be heartbroken too. He doesn't want me to have this heartache, this pain, this suffering, THIS life.....

But, this is my life.....

So where is God during all this.........................


The same place I would be if my child were to be.............................

living a painful life,

lived a hurtful life,

been hurt.....

still hurting....

RIGHT HERE

Ready to embrace, rescue, guard, love, cherish, hold, cradle, save, defend, console, protect, comfort, shield, and heal.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

What's Your Purpose?

God created us all for a purpose!
I can tell you that God gave me a gift. My gift is to teach. I love teaching. I love children.  I get so excited when they "get it!" But, the main reason I love to teach, is because God told me to.  (That story will come later) I get to impact the lives of so many children and share my love of Christ with them through my words and actions.

But..... lately I have felt that God has another "purpose" awaiting me.

I have always wanted to be a writer. At one time, I thought I would write children's books. My husband use to tell me that I should write Mysteries. I have the most vivid action/adventure dreams at night. In the morning, I can't wait to tell him my dream. His response is always the same, "You should write that, it would be a great book!"


Years later I get the urge again, but I still don't "know" what to write about. So, I do what I do best, I work on my Masters and write papers in graduate school. Not the kind of writing I think God has in mind, but I get better at the mechanics of writing.

Being in a storm of life, is like being in a small boat in a storm. It tosses you around a lot. You cry out to God, "Save me, Help me!" When the storm is in full force, you don't even know what all is going on around you. You just hold on for the ride. But during that stormy ride, you find your faith. Your Trust. Your HOPE!

During such a storm, I found myself and my purpose. It may be for my benefit alone, but man what a ride it has been. I love writing. But more importantly, I love sharing what GOD has done in me. What God is doing still.

My deepest desire is to bring honor and glory to my Heavenly Father. 

You know why? HE NEVER LEFT ME IN THE STORM. :)

Even a Great Husband Makes a Very Poor God

Lysa Hits the NAIL ON THE HEAD with this post!
Keep on preaching, Sister!!!

Even a Great Husband Makes a Very Poor God

I'm FED UP!

Ok, I said it! I am FED UP with all the negative news about all the marriages that are broken. Kate and Jon, Sandra and Jesse James, Brad and Jennifer, Jessica and Nick, Brittney and K-Fed, I could go on and on and ON.... but ENOUGH already!

Are these the ROLE MODELS our kids have to see and  hear about day in and day out? Aren't there enough kids living in broken homes ALREADY? THIS should NOT be the NORM!!!

I admit it....... I love reality TV, but our world's reality is so out of sync with God's truths.

You want TRUTH, read Ephesians Chapter 5! This chapter tells us HOW TO LIVE! Marriages are breaking up at an astonding rate. Why.... read Ephesians Chapter 5!

As a teacher, I see what divorce does to the ones left behind, the children. What kind of legacy are we leaving our children? What kind of role models? What kind of Christian witness? 

Instead of being sickened by the break-up of families, we are NUMB to it! Satan is having a grand ole time with us. He is detroying men, women, and children's lives, but most importantly, HE is leaving lasting scars on our children....  Children that will be NUMB to what GOD intends for marriage and family.

Get FED UP!  Stop believing Satan's LIE! It is not OKAY to destroy families! It should never be the norm to end marriages and break up families. 

Be the husband God intends you to be. Be the wife God intends you to be. Leave a legacy. Be a role model.  Be a witness. Be who you "claim" to be.

Don't believe the lies on TV and let it be the norm. Teach your children, divorce is NOT the answer.... read them Ephesians Chapter 5.  Teach them the TRUTH of God's word. It has got to stop!

In the past year and a half, I have had too many friends go through divorce. I know it takes TWO, but ONE can make a difference. ONE can get on their knees and pray. ONE can forgive, love and STAND for their marriage.  The power of the Holy Spirit can heal, satisfy, restore, and give hope to ANYONE!

If you've been betrayed, forgive, if you are being abused, get out! Get help! Get counseling! PRAY, PRAY and PRAY! Determine to become the person God intended you to be. If divorce happens, pray for your children to have healing, that you will be a role model and you will help create a healthy legacy.  Don't let Satan leave you wounded and feeling unworthy of every having love again.... HE CAN HEAL you and LOVE you like no other! Your life can be fuller now than it ever was before.  

Know God's love for you, know your own WORTH, and teach this to your children. Forgive, trust, believe, and love again. Read Ephesians Chapter 5! Believe Ephesians Chapter 5! LIVE, Ephesians Chapter 5!

Ephesians 5

1. Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children 2. and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

3. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. 4. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. 6. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God's wrath comes on those who are disobedient. 7. Therefore do not be partners with them.

8. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light 9. (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) 10. and find out what pleases the Lord. 11. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. 12. For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. 13. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, 14. for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said:

"Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you."

15. Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, 16. making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. 17. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. 18. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. 19. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, 20. always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 21. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives and Husbands

22. Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26. to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27. and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30. for we are members of his body. 31. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32. This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Are Online Love Affairs On The Rise?

Are Online Love Affairs On The Rise?

You may think that this will never happen to your marriage.... beware, it is closer than you think.

Some say I'm Lucky, I say I'm Blessed!

I have been blogging for about 9 weeks, and through reading other encouraging and inspriational blogger, I have found many others through their "links". These bloggers have lifted my spirits and encouraged me when my days were dark.

Below is the link to a blessing I have just received! I entered to win a book written by Pete Wilson called PLAN B. Justin and Trisha have a wonderful website that encourages others. They share their story of HOPE and how God transformed their marraige and ministry. They have blessed me in their words.

I can't begin to express how EXCITED I am about being one of four winners!  Check out the link below!!!

http://refineus.org/2010/04/our-plan-b/

Need A Hug?

I am a touchy, feely, kinda gal. I love hugs. Not "hang ons", but sweet, short, strong hugs. As a teacher, I get all kinds of hugs. There is nothing as precious as getting 5 to 50 hugs a day from little children. They give hugs freely, unconditionally, and without hestitation.

So, what happens to us as we get older? Do we not need hugs?

As an adult, I want to feel the arms of those who love me, embrace me. "Sweet, Short, Strong" But, as we get older, we get more and more inhibited. We guard our selves and our hearts from physical touch. But based on both scientific and spiritual evidence, TOUCH is necessary for human development (infants who are not held or touched often do not thrive), healing, and quality of life.
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From the world's perspective:

Christopher Uhl wrote  "Of all the human senses, touch is the social sense—the sense that most powerfully invites us into relationship with each other." 

Now, Isn't that why we were created in the first place? Didn't God create us to fellowship one with another? Love each other.

Touch is “our richest means of emotional expression” says Dacher Keltner, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley. According to The New York Times, researchers found that:
"Students who received a supportive touch on the back or arm from a teacher were nearly twice as likely to volunteer in class as those who did not, studies have found. A sympathetic touch from a doctor leaves people with the impression that the visit lasted twice as long, compared with estimates from people who were untouched. Research by Tiffany Field of the Touch Research Institute in Miami has found that a massage (touch) from a loved one can not only ease pain but also soothe depression and strengthen a relationship."


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From God's perspective- healing and/ or life were given through touch.


Matthew 8:3.......Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him, saying, "I am willing; be cleansed." And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
Matthew 8:15........He touched her hand, and the fever left her; and she got up and waited on Him.

Matthew 9:20.....And a woman who had been suffering from a hemorrhage for twelve years, came up behind Him and touched the fringe of His cloak;


Matthew 9:21.....for she was saying to herself, "If I only touch His garment, I will get well."

Matthew 9:29.....Then He touched their eyes, saying, "It shall be done to you according to your faith."


Matthew 14:36.....and they implored Him that they might just touch the fringe of His cloak; and as many as touched it were cured.


Matthew 17:7.....And Jesus came to them and touched them and said, "Get up, and do not be afraid."

Matthew 20:34....Moved with compassion, Jesus touched their eyes; and immediately they regained their sight and followed Him.

Mark 1:41......Moved with compassion, Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him, and said to him, "I am willing; be cleansed."

Mark 3:10...for He had healed many, with the result that all those who had afflictions pressed around Him in order to touch Him.

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From my perspective, touch matters. Whether you are giving it or getting it, the benefits outweigh the cost.  So hug someone, give a pat on the back, embace a loved one...............your life and theirs will be all the better for it!

Love, God's Way

1 Corinthians 13:7 "Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."(SLAB)

I must confess, this verse is for me.  I have a hard time loving like 1 Corn. 13:7.  My main problem is my expectations of myself and others is not in line with loving God's way.

I am hard on myself, but I am hard on those closest to me as well.  I am changing, by the grace of God, but I am still struggling.  The whole reason I chose CHANGE as my title for my blog, is because without changes, I would implode (burst or explode from within). 

My life was totally in utter ciaos. I was a wreck.

I begged for God to help me, and He did.  He loved me.  Then He put on my heart the answer.  "Robyn, you need to change.  I did not create you and not love you. Give yourself to me and let me transform (change) you into who I created you to be."

WOW! That seems like a simple enough request, but when strongholds and years of living in them have set up residence, it is not easy to let go of the familiar with the healthy.

God wants me healthy. Mentally, physically, and spiritually. But I needed to CHANGE. 

I long to be in God's will. So the journey began. Change began to happen. Within me I could feel my spirits lift. I could see answered prayers. God began His work in me.

This verse is so very important to my transformation because LOVE is the key.  Love yourself, love others, and love your Lord.  If I totally get what real LOVE is, then I will be Christ-like.... and that is the key.  But, I had to let it begin with my willingness to let go, and trust God to change me.

I read the Bible everyday, sometimes many times a day. I love the truths that God has revealed to me through His word. I pray and praise God. I fellowship with others, and ask them to pray for me. And God has begun a great transformation in me.

My desires, my hopes, my direction in life as changed. Only through Christ could this have happened. I owe him MY LIFE!  There was a time when I wanted my life to end on this earth, but God so loved ME, he healed my brokenness and restored my hope. 

I still have struggles with doubt, fear, and anxiousness. But, I know that I now have a purpose and a direction, and a Savior that will help me continue to be forever CHANGED! 

I told my son, "I bet you think I am a "Jesus Freak!"  He smiled.... You know what I AM! AND VERY PROUD OF IT! 

If God can change me............... and that is no easy task, he can change you into the person he wants you to be! 

"Love always believes the best of everyone"  Joyce Meyers on 1 Corn. 13:7

Stop Beating Yourself Up!

A child in my class did something minuscule the other day. It was no big thing, dropped a pencil, lost his paper, whatever it was I don't even remember, but I do remember this. This child said to himself, "I am so stupid!" To this I was appalled and said to him, "DO NOT EVER TALK TO YOURSELF LIKE THAT AGAIN!"

You know why I was so enraged that a CHILD would say to themselves, "I am so stupid," because I have been there and done that myself! Ooh..... makes my skin boil even now. I talked down to myself for years. I am determined not to let another generation pass by my way with a mindset that would ever allow ANYONE child or adult to feel less than perfect!


Not two days later, a friend of mine got herself into a situation that left her wounded and broken. She shared with me how worthless, unloved and stupid she about herself.

Yesterday was Easter Sunday. Christ is alive. Jesus died on the cross for us: stupid, unloved, sinners, hateful, lustful, deceitful, and despicable human beings HE CREATED. Can't we give ourselves a break. Satan wants us to feel defeated, stupid, but not Christ. He loves us! He made us!

 Luke 12:7 (NIV)   " Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."

If Christ took it ON THE CROSS, can't we just take it TO THE CROSS!


1 Timothy 1:15 "................Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners..........." (NASB)

Luke 19:10    "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost."  (KJV)

STOP beating up yourself!  Love yourself for the unique and perfect creation you are! God does! :)

Remaining Faithful

My favorite days are the ones that I get up, drink coffee, spend time with my family before they head out, then get on my bed and listen to a weeks worth of "Life Today with James Robinson" and "Joyce Meyers, Enjoying Everyday Life."  This is pure JOY to me! This is my  "me" time. I read my bible, pray and listen to the encouraging words spoken from God's truth (HIS HOLY WORD).  I just LOVE LOVE LOVE it!

Well, today in the midst of "my time" I had a phone call from a friend. She has been going through a very rough year. As we talked, I shared with her how much her friendship means to me. How I felt God had put us together for a reason and how blessed I am to have her in my life.

You know, this life is tough. Circumstances happen that can leave us torn and bleeding. Our very hearts can feel as though they have been ripped out of our chest. There are times we may feel like we will never feel pure JOY again.

Job was a man, who should have felt NO JOY!  God allowed Satan to test him.. He endured extreme suffering, and lost EVERYTHING! If you read the book of JOB you will find that  God blessed him because he remained faithful.


Job 42:12 "The LORD blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first......"

Maybe the time in your life is not a time of pure joy. Maybe it is a time of testing and trials. Remain faithful. Remain hopeful.  It is easy to be joyful in the good times, but how does your joy hold out in the bad times?

I seek pure JOY and I have learned that it does not come from this world, but through a relationship with Christ alone. Am I always joyful?  OF COURSE NOT, but I NEVER GIVE UP!

Hebrews 10:36 (New International Version)  "You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."

Captivated by Love

Dear friend,

If I could just write like this..... so real.... so relevant! I hope this post by a fellow blogger touches your heart just like it touched mine!


Captivated by Love