Friday, November 19, 2010

Being Blessed

I am blessed. I know this because this morning,.............. I awoke.

I have all my fingers and my toes.
My health, my family, my friends, my pets......
God has truly blessed me.
This morning my heart is full. I am so thankful for the love that fills me.
I am happy. I am content. I am at peace.

Because of what CHRIST has done for me. I am blessed.

I hope you feel blessed too.
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord
and have made the Lord their hope and confidence."
Jeremiah 17:7 (New Living Translation)

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Celebrating Life in the Middle!

This week, I will be celebrating my birthday~ Yeah, me!
I received an email from my sweet friend that had a list written by a 90 year old lady who wrote 45 life lessons she has learned over the years..... got me to thinking about my own life lessons.
 " If you regret your past and then; try to deny it, it called depression. If you regret your past and then; try to forgive it, it called a lesson." @AmandaAdriani on Twitter

So, here's my list of my life lessons.....
1. Smile more, it brightens every one's day...including yours.
2. When you are alone in your car, spend time with God.
3.Listening is the key to communication.
4.Choose friends who are make you laugh.
5.Tell your family you love them often.
6.Take a bubble bath in a bathroom filled with candles.
7. Do an act of kindness for someone else.
8. Drive the speed limit (just saying)
9.Read the Bible daily.
10. Be respectful to your parents.
11. If you really don't want to do something, It's okay to say, "No." 
12. Be good to yourself, but not at the cost of neglecting others.
13. Write it down, before you forget.
14. Reading glasses look cool. (and have become a necessity)
15. Be techno savvy, it helps in communicating with your kids.
16. Get to know new people.
17. Find new interests and hobbies that stimulate your mind.
18. Make your favorite dessert from time to time.
19. Do something nice for yourself once a week.
20. Watch more sunrises and sunsets.
21. Spend time with your pets.
22. Sing with the radio.
23. If you are too tired to cook or clean, don't.
24. Accept your own imperfections.
25. Forgive yourself and others.
26. Be kind.
27. Believe in a better day tomorrow.
28. Be grateful and generous
29. Let your children learn from their own mistakes.
30. If it's too good to be true.... beware.
31. Know that what you do, affects others.
32. Get to know your grandparents.
33. Go through photos of your life and your family
34. Always wear a seat belt and don't text and drive.
35. Take time to vacation with your children, they'll be gone soon enough.
36. Create special holiday traditions.
37. Don't pick your nose (even if you think no one is looking, use a tissue)
38.  Pass positivity down to your children, not negativity.
39.  Think before you speak.
40.  Time does heal
41. Encourage the next generation to come, that they will be the ones to make a difference in this world.
42. Trust God
43. Dream, make plans, set goals.
44. Don't believe everything you hear.
45. Be brave, courageous, and loyal.

Well, that's my list.... I could probably go on, but I tend to get silly when I get let me leave you with this one..... (just for fun)

46. Murphy's law will, of course, apply to numbers 1- 45 above. :)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Damaged goods....

For years I blamed myself for the abuse. For years I held in the pain. For years I wanted to feel "normal." For years I longed to be loved. For years I wanted someone to protect me. You want to know what being abused does to someone............................... really? It creates in them a mindset that "I am not worthy of love" that I am here for to be USED and mistreated. That my feelings don't mean anything..........because I don't matter. When you are abused by someone who is suppose to LOVE and PROTECT you............... it does major damage. I held in my little "secret" for years. WHY? because the person I SHOULD HAVE BEEN TOTALLY ABLE TO TRUST told me to me to "keep it a secret" DON'T TELL ANYONE or YOU will get in trouble. As an adult, I just want to hold that little girl and tell her........."Honey, it is not your fault!"  It never was! I kept that secret from my own mother and father for over 35 years. I held inside my heart: a major life event, a trama, an unspeakable injustice, for YEARS. Do you know what it is to feel like to be "damaged goods?"  That sex is for someone else's pleasure, not your own. To feel that no MAN can ever really love you? That no MAN will ever protect you? That YOU are totally on your own in this world? because..................YOU ARE NOT WORTH LOVING! The HURT that still resides in my heart over the decisions I have made in my life because I have felt....................................unloved. The way I accept unkindness, hateful, disrespectful, unloving behavior is totally...............wrong.

By the BLESSED LOVE OF CHRIST JESUS, I am healing. God is healing me................bit by broken bit. When I stand before HIM I really hope HE tells me WHY.......... I just want to know...................................... I want to be able to KNOW what real love is.......... I want to be protected. I want to be cherished......................really cherished just because I was created. I want to have that "normal", or what seems to be normal...........because I don't know that I will ever really understand what "NORMAL" looks like, feels like. I know God is the healer.......... . I know God loves me.......... Because, I have begged God to take me home to Glory more times than I can count.  It isn't that I am ungrateful for "life" , it is because I KNOW THERE IS FREEDOM from the PAIN.  That day when we move from this life.....we will move into.....REAL LIFE!

My favorite verse is Proverbs 31:25 "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and laughs with no fear of the future" I am ready to laugh!
So......... why am I sharing this all NOW? Because I know comfort, hope and healing.  That something good can come from something evil.
If you have held in a "secret" that was to protect someone else, it is harmful not only to you, but to them.  People who really love you, don't treat you in private differently than they do in public. If someone is abusing you.............. TELL SOMEONE! Get help! Get into church and get into God's word. Only HE can save you. Only Christ's love can heal your brokenness. Only Christ can give you the LOVE you will need to FORGIVE. Because YOU CAN FEEL LOVED...... by CHRIST! You can feel worthy. You can feel cherished. You can feel protected. If God can carry me through my journey, HE can take you through yours too! YOU ARE LOVED! YOU ARE LOVED! YOU ARE LOVED! because......................GOD IS LOVE!

Patriots close season with winning streak - The Dispatch

Patriots close season with winning streak - The Dispatch

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Serena Woods

Being a Teen's Mom...

I won't do everything right. I will make mistakes. I will do and say the wrong thing, at the wrong times, in the wrong way.....  not because I am not trying.............. It is because I am learning.

Learning to be a mom of a baby was easy for me. I kissed and cuddled and rocked.... and loved my precious child.

Learning to be a mom of a toddler was easy too. I chased after, read to, colored with, and made more messes than I ever have in my whole life, and enjoyed every single moment of it.

Learning to be a mom of a grade school(er) was easy. I taxied from birthdays to sports to family outings. I cheered for at games. I helped with homework and packed those many lunches.

Learning to be a mom of a teenager ........... isn't easy. For either of us. Now, my actions take on different meanings for us.

To me I am supporting, to my child I am interfering.
To me I am spending quality time, to my child I am being nosy.
To me I am talking about the important issues (sex, drugs, and Satan), to my child I am lecturing.
To me I am loving, to my child I am smothering.

I know my son hears me. I just wonder if he listens.........

I am ready to set my child free in the world. (really, I am).

I believe children learn through our actions more than our words. My life is my legacy. My actions are forever ingrained in his mind. My words have hurt or healed. My love is unselfish or self serving.

As my son gets ready to enter into "his own" world...... I know my biggest power over his life now is PRAYER. I have prayed over my son for years, but never - ever like I have and during his young adult life. I know my son is saved, and that gives me insurmountable peace.

So, as I pray for guidance through these last months together..... I pray for wisdom, patience, mercy, grace and endurance for us both. We have a unique bond, us two.  Parent and child, Mother and son,  Friend and friend.

"Train up a child in the way he should go,

Even when he is old he will not depart from it."

Proverbs 22:6 (New American Standard Bible)